So far so 'good' (Wk1/16, Dose 1 +5days)

Nausea is not the friend of chemo patients. Since my first dose on Tuesday, I've benefitted from a combination of meds that were pumped IV during my infusion and three oral medications to treat nausea - Decadron (every 12 hours), Prochlorperazin (every 6), and Ondansetron as needed (every 8 hours). Yesterday was the first day I didn’t need to take oral meds. It feels like a minor victory. Four days of meds, five days past first chemo infusion and I've learned three things:
  • I'm lucky I don't have a chronic illness; 
  • the anti-nausea cocktail seems to be working; 
  • Prochlorperazine is not a long term friend. 
I'm pathetic with a medication schedule. The anesthesiology teams for both surgeries (removing the tumor and placing my infusion port) were amazed I was 100% prescription free 'at (my) age'. "Other than the cancer - which of course is a serious illness - you're remarkably healthy." Low blood pressure, good resting heart rate, normal blood sugar levels, healthy BMI, no chronic illness, no prescription medications. I'm afraid I made their job (keeping me alive on the table) downright easy. Now that administering meds is on my plate; I realize how incredibly pathetic I am complying with dosing schedules. One med, fine. Two? Easier if they have concurrent dosing. Three? Foggedaboutit. I'm never early, but have a bad habit of skipping or slipping; which in my case creates a nightmare syncopated dosing schedule beyond the grasp of my simple mind. Thankfully, Pete is on top of it. I may not be able to fully comprehend his notes and scribbles, but I trust the right med is making into my gullet at the right time. Victory!

The anti-nausea cocktail seems to be working; and so does the amazing care my husband is providing. To date I've stayed remarkably side effect free. Have I felt great? Hell no. I'm a little unstable, get cold easily, shiver, and am just a little more spacey than I'm comfortable with. Have I been a functioning human being? For the most part. Not 100% but passable, even in the office. I wish I could take credit but my physical and metal stability is mainly because Pete is propping me up. He's been a trooper. He makes me delicious breakfasts, reminds me to hydrate, sends me to work with a yummy nutritious lunch, and picks up the slack around the house. All that on top of being champion pill tracker. I'm cautiously hopeful our current approach is sustainable and will serve me well through my full course of treatment. I know I’ve been lucky and it will get harder as treatment continues; so long as we can keep the dreaded god-awful days to a minimum we'll make it through.

I had one little giddy up Thursday when, after two days on board, Prochlorperazine proved to be less than friendly. I was feeling like a champ. Put in a day at work; even fooled people I was 'normal'. I had this post-infusion rollercoaster tamed. Ha! I woke up Thursday feeling a little jittery. My hands weren't shaking but my chest, and pretty much anything "inside" my skin was vibrating (No, I'm not taking hallucinogenics). Not pleasant. I managed to make it to work but quickly realized in addition to the physical harmonics, mentally I was a hot mess. I was completely unable to concentrate. On anything. I beat a quick retreat home, anxious, agitated, antsy. Despite the alliteration it was not a Grade-A day. Thankfully, the (massively responsive) Oncology nurse was there to help. After a quick consult with colleagues and my Oncologist we decided to drop the Prochlorperazine. I only had an hour or so to wait until – bam – the vibrations stopped. My mind rested. I took a MONSTER nap and woke feeling "chemo normal". Thank god.  (Timing wasn't ideal. I missed Long Claw's Potlatch at school that night; hoping they'll let me crash next year.)

With my learnings under my belt, I've enjoyed the weekend doing seemingly regular things: watching a soccer match in the cold rain, tidying the house, talking a walk, running an errand or two, reading the paper.  Only every little thing takes just a little more focused concentration than usual. My mind is hazy; as if there's a piece of gauze between me and the rest of the world. It's downright exhausting forcing me to choose wisely on how I spend the energy I have.

Current (random) thoughts? I’m either on the edge of a cliff and fooling myself; or infusion one is really behind me. I’m incredibly lucky (manageable symptoms, supportive husband, amazing community). My taste buds are changing: can’t detect lemon, milk is ambrosia, ginger and chipotle are good for a little excitement.

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